Critics Consensus:Puddle

Hi! We are Critics Consensus. We post the regular critics opinion for video games and movies! Today it is Puddle a port of the 2012 game that everybody forgot.

Puddle got very negative reception upon it's release. It was probably because it was so hard and meant for another system. Well Konami made the easy decision to port Puddle over to the WiiU. Let's see if it holds up.
The good news is that it is not as horrible as the Xbox 360 and Playstation 3 versions because the controls were so bad but, it has no new features coming to the WiiU and the difficulty is still the same as ReviewsOnTheRun complained.
Overall I would not recommend this one.
Puddle is rated T.

Critics Consensus: Skulls Of The Shogun

Hi! We are Critics Consensus. We post the regular critics opinion for video games and movies! Today it is Skulls Of The Shogun a new strategy game made by Sega.

When we are during a video game drought every title catches our eye. Skulls Of The Shogun is one of them. Even better Skulls Of The Shogun is a rare breed. A strategy game for a console. These are very few and far between like 5 a year. Let's hope this does not disappoint.
Well like XCOM and Planets Under Attack it does not. Game Informer praised the brilliant tactics you can place and Games Master UK praised the graphics. Skulls Of The Shogun is maybe one of the best console strategy games. It should have co-op but that has been the only complaint so far.
Overall get this game if you wanna.
Skulls Of The Shogun is rated T.

Critics Consensus: Parker

Hi! We are Critics Consensus. We post the regular critics opinion for video games and movies! Today it is Parker, Jason Statham's new movie.

Jason Statham is like a machine that pumps out movies Transporter,Killer Elite,Safe, and now Parker. This has got to be one of the worst weeks for film in 2013.
Parker is not a great movie. It's not like it's bad but it's generic and mediocre. To sum it up as Rolling Stone said "Parker" winds up with the worst of both worlds: It's pointlessly violent and nauseatingly cute. That's about right. Jason Statham is now a genre of movie.
Overall do not see this movie.
Parker is rated R,

Critics Consensus: John Dies At The End

Hi! We are Critics Consensus. We post the regular critics opinion for video games and movies! Today it is John Dies At The End a new indie horror film.

John Dies At The End has been getting a lot of reception because of it's interesting title, interesting plot and interesting development process. The film was made on literally the cost of a lunch at Starbucks. Somehow they got Paul Giamatti in there.

John Dies At The End is about a drug that an out of body experience with each hit. Two friends try it out and well I think the title already spoiled it for you a little bit. It's is not the greatest movie with a 57 on both fronts (Metacritic and Rotten Tomatoes) but as The New Movie Thing Show said it's a good movie to brighten up your day.

Overall see this movie if you want to.

John Dies At The End is rated R.

Critics Consensus: Movie 43

Hi! We are Critics Consensus. We post the regular critics opinion for video games and movies! Today it is Movie 43 a new movie full of a stadiums worth of recognized actors. That will ruin their career forever.

When I saw the trailer for Movie 43 I died a little inside. All these actors, all this money being thrown at the camera and yet indie comedies struggle to get made while this piece of trash exists. The least Movie 43 could do was get a 43% percent on Rotten Tomatoes.
It got a 5%. Emma Stone, Hugh Jackman, Justin Long, Gerald Butler, Johnny Knoxville,Naomi Watts, and Kristen Bell should all hang their heads in shame. Your agents must me drunk. "Movie 43" is the "Citizen Kane" of awful.
Overall please do not see this movie. I'll give you 5 bucks. 
Movie 43 is rated R.

Critics Consensus: Hansel & Gretel: Witch Hunters

Hi! We are Critics Consensus. We post the regular critics opinion for video games and movies! Today it is hansel and Gretel: Witch Hunters. Now I am certain Hollywood is gonna make a movie about microwaves.

January is a fairly crappy release for feature films. So far it's the 27th and there has only been one OK movie. No good one's though. It is also filled to the brim with releases that are obviously crap. Take this movie for example and instead of explaining why it sucks which I usually do let's laugh at what the critics said.
Rolling Stone said that it was the longest ninety minutes you have ever spent in a theater,USA Today said that it was so many genre's at once that it was genre stew, and lastly Not only is not even a single character more than one-dimensional, but every line falls flatter than a witch dispatched with a Gatling gun. Thank you The Playlist you gave me a much needed laugh.
Overall do not see this movie. It is made by stupid people for stupid people. Typical Hollywood.
Hansel & Gretel: Witch Hunters is rated R.

Critics Consensus: The Cave

Hi! We are Critics Consensus. We post the regular critics opinion for video games and movies! Today it is The Cave a new downloadable platformer from Double Fine.

Double Fine has a track record of never giving a disappointment. They also have a track record of moving with different publishers and poor sales records. However fans love em. Sadly Double Fine's newest game The Cave is not getting the best reception.
The Cave has been getting a lot and when I mean a lot I mean a lot of mixed reviews. Some critics have given it a 8.5 like SmoshGames who praised the story and other reviewers like Gamespot who deflected the challenging puzzles. Lastly Strategy Informer gave the worst review with a 4.0 out of 10 calling it a major disappointment.
Overall only get this game if you want to.
The Cave is rated E10+.

Critics Consensus: Ni No Kuni: Wrath Of The White Witch

Hi! We are Critics Consensus. We post the regular critics opinion for video games and movies! Today it is Ni No Kuni: Wrath Of The White Witch.

Ni No Kuni: Wrath Of The White Witch has been getting a lot of attention lately and even getting Machinima's best RPG of E3 award. That was awhile ago but still there were so other role playing games and they chose that means that Ni No Kuni is really something special.

Ni No Kuni is written by Studio Ghilbi who wrote such films as Spirited Away and Akira so they are really popular in Japan and kinda the US, anyway back to the critics. The negative reviews I could find were Game Informers 7 out of 10 stating that the story was beautiful but the mechanics were old school. With an 87 on Metacritic though I think you do not need to trust Game Informer on this one.

Overall get this game. Please trust me.

Ni No Kuni: Wrath of the White Witch is rated E10+.

Critics Consensus: Broken City

Hi! We are Critics Consensus. We post the regular critics opinion for video games and movies! Today it is Broken City a new Mark Wahlberg movie!

There's bad Mark Wahlberg movies and theirs Mark Wahlberg movies that are so bad you want to forget them entirely (Max Payne, The Happening). I have good news and bad news. Broken City is not that. But Broken City is still dog crap.
Toronto Star thought that the movie was so bad that the actors agents must have been drunk accepting this. Why Broken City is forgettable, has poor writing and is constantly action and no story. If you like that, you deserve a slap in the face.
Overall do not see this movie. Trust me it's one of those Bargain Bin movies you see 3 years later.
Broken City is rated R.

Critics Consensus: Mama

Hi! We are Critics Consensus. We post the regular critics opinion for video games and movies! Today it is Mama a new horror movie that as cliche written all over it. But is still getting good reviews.

Guillermo Del Toro is one hella smart guy. Unfortunately he lacks in producing because his latest movie Mama about some demon kids living the woods has a 62%. That's not horrible but I think he's putting all his attention into Pacific Rim nowadays.
The only reason that Mama is getting good reviews is that it is cliche as The New York Times stated but manages not to scare with gore but to scare with other tactics. Some other movies have done this (House At The End Of The Street) but it has not really worked. Glad to see that Mama can change the game.
Overall see this movie. 
Mama is rated PG-13.

Critics Consensus: The Last Stand

Hi! We are Critics Consensus. We post the regular critics opinion for video games and movies! Today it is The Last Stand Arnold Schwarzenegger's new movie!

The Last Stand is aptly named. If it fails at the box office it will be Arnold Schwarzenegger's last stand. If you have been under a rock for twenty years but still know who Arnold is, he was involved in a affair, became governer and started his movie career back. Wow.
The Last Stand stars Arnold Schwarzenegger and Johnny Knoxville is about a sherrif against a drug cartel. As ReviewsOnTheRun explained it is a weak movie in Schwarznenegger terms but it's nice to see him back. Even if he is a dick.
Overall only see this movie if you want to. 
'The Last Stand is rated R.

Critics Consensus: Devil May Cry

Hi! We are Critics Consensus. We post the regular critics opinion for video games and movies! Today it is Devil May Cry the new reboot of the old Devil May Cry series.

Well it's here. The last Devil May Cry game was 2008's Devil May Cry 4. That was four years ago. Capcom decided to reboot the series. With the help of Ninja Theory the masterminds of Heavenly Sword. Well is it good? Cause Dante's new transformation was getting a lot of flack.
Telegraph called it a blistering start to 2013 (that means it's good if you don't get the simile.) GamesTM praised the razor sharp content, ZTGameDomain called it an early contender for one of their. That seems a little ambitious because the year just started but whatever.
Overall you should probably get this game.
Devil May Cry is rated M.

Critics Consensus: A Haunted House

Hi! We are Critics Consensus. We post the regular critics opinion for video games and movies! Today it is A Haunted House a paranormal parody of the Paranormal Activity series.

Honestly I don't know why I'm covering this. I didn't cover the Oogieloves because well you knew it was going to be crap. You know that the critics will hate this just by watching thirty seconds of the movie. These type of movies never get good acclaim and usually make a profit of their budget. Hey at least we can laugh at these comments made by critics. Let's go.

Entertainment Weekly complained that the film had way too many fart gags 1,783 to be exact,The A.V Club called it a mercenary cash-grab and lastly The New York Times said best "If the opening gag in your R-rated movie is an extended flatulence joke you should reconsider whether you're qualified to make such a movie. Not that flatulence jokes aren't funny; 8-year-olds love them. The thing is, not many 8-year-olds go to R-rated movies."

Overall well this is pretty obvious. If you are reading the Overall sentence you deserve a slap in the face.

A Haunted House is rated R.

Critics Consensus: Gangster Squad

Hi! We are Critics Consensus. We post the regular critics opinion for video games and movies! Today it is Gangster Squad Ryan Gosling's new movie!

Gangster Squad had a lot of promise. You've probably heard that Gangster Squad is a mess. In fact it probably would not have been that. When the first trailer came out in it there was someone shooting in a movie theater. A few weeks later the Aurora Shooting happened and the director of Gangster Squad, Ruben Fleischer decided to take that out of the movie. The problem? The whole film had to be rewritten and reshooted because that scene was a major plot point.
Gangster Squad has been tryanted that the movie can not tell if it want's to be a drama or a comedy\spoof by Christian Science Monitor. (Example: In the movie they interrogate a guy and think he's lying. Sean Penn says "you know the drill" and then instead of some stupid routine they actually get a power drill and drill it through the guy's head. Seriously? Also the Charlotte Observer called it cliched nonsense. Ouch.
Overall do not see Gangster Squad. You will be disappointed. Very Very Much.
Gangster Squad is rated R. 

Critics Consensus Special: My Reaction To The 2012 Oscar Nominations

Hi! We are Critics Consensus. We post the regular critics opinion for video games and movies! Today it is my reaction the the 2012 Oscar Nominations.

Best Picture:

"Beasts of the Southern Wild"

"Silver Linings Playbook"

"Zero Dark Thirty"

"Lincoln"

"Les Miserables"

"Life of Pi"

"Amour"

"Django Unchained"

"Argo"

To be honest this is fine in my book. Why no Looper though? Zero Dark Thirty should win.

Best Supporting Actor:

Christoph Waltz, "Django Unchained"

Philip Seymour Hoffman, "The Master"

Robert De Niro, "Silver Linings Playbook"

Alan Arkin, "Argo"

Tommy Lee Jones, "Lincoln"

No John Goodman?

Best Director:

David O. Russell, "Silver Linings Playbook"

Ang Lee, "Life of Pi"

Steven Spielberg, "Lincoln"

Michael Haneke, "Amour"

Benh Zeitlin, "Beasts of the Southern Wild"

No Argo or Zero Dark Thirty? Screw you Oscars

Best Actor:

Daniel Day Lewis, "Lincoln"

Denzel Washington, "Flight"

Hugh Jackman, "Les Miserables"

Bradley Cooper, "Silver Linings Playbook"

Joaquin Phoenix, "The Master"

Flight? But no Ben Affleck

Best Actress:

Naomi Watts, "The Impossible"

Jessica Chastain, "Zero Dark Thirty"

Jennifer Lawrence, "Silver Linings Playbook"

Emmanuelle Riva, "Amour"

Quvenzhané Wallis, "Beasts of the Southern Wild"

Good. Go Quvenzhané Wallis!

Best Original Screenplay:

"Zero Dark Thirty"

"Django Unchained"

"Moonrise Kingdom"

"Amour"

"Flight"
Good.

Best Adapted Screenplay:

"Lincoln"

"Silver Linings Playbook"

"Argo"

"Life of Pi"

"Beasts of the Southern Wild"
Good.

Best Animated Feature:

"Frankenweenie"

"The Pirates! Band of Misfits"

"Wreck-It Ralph"

"Paranorman"

"Brave"
Weak nominees. Go Pirates!

Critics Consensus: Anarchy Reigns

Hi! We are Critics Consensus. We post the regular critics opinion for video games and movies! Today it is Anarchy Reigns Sega's new fighting game!

Anarchy Reigns had a troubled development. It was supposed to come out in January 2011 but that never happened. Then summer 2012. That never happened. Finally January 2013. Anarchy Reigns is finally out but a troubled development does not fair well with games. (Duke Nukem Forever,SSX) Let's see if Anarchy Reigns can pull up it's Reigns and be a good game.
Anarchy Reigns is OK. Digital Chumps said that it was not perfect but still fun alone or with friends and Official Xbox Magazine praised the online multiplayer. The problem is as Game Informer said is that other fighting games kick their ass in comparison (no pun intended.)
Overall only get this game if you wanna. You probably have no money after last year but ya know..
Anarchy Reigns is rated M.

Critics Consensus Special: Quickie Update 2

So the Oscar nominations should becoming any day now. That day will announce my nominations. The next week I will say the winners.

Critics Consensus: Promised Land

Hi! We are Critics Consensus. We post the regular critics opinion for video games and movies! Today it is Promised Land, Matt Damon's new movie.

Promised Land came out in limited release at the very end of the year just like a bunch of other movies. Usually that's a hit or miss. Sadly no Oscar buzz has come for Promised Land. Here's why.

Promised Land is about a big business versus a small community owned town. It seems interesting but where most critics threw the hatchet is it's final 15 minutes. (ReelViews,New York Post,Time) I do not want to spoil but everything derails from there.

Overall rent this. Unless you really want to see it.

Promised Land is rated R.

Critics Consensus: Texas Chainsaw Massacre 3D

Hi! We are Critics Consensus. We post the regular critics opinion for video games and movies! Today it is Texas Chainsaw Massacre 3D.

Every year the first movie is a horror movie. It is rated R, Not screened before critics and usually has no big name actors. Texas Chainsaw 3D has Trey Songz and he's a rapper for Pete's Sake. This does not look good.

Texas Chainsaw 3D is the regular plot of a Leatherface movie. He's comin with a damn chainsaw and you better run fast or your pretty much dead. The highest big name review I could find was a couple of 60's from The A.V. Club and Variety. Also the positive reception that was only getting this a 32% is that the end is a new take for horror movies. Still sucks though because nearly all of the movie is super generic as Slant Magazine stated.

Texas Chainsaw Massacre is rated R.