Friday, March 29, 2013

Critics Consensus: Army Of Two:The Devil's Cartel

Hi! We are Critics Consensus. We post the regular critics opinion for video games and movies! Today it is a new Army Of Two game!
A while ago back in 2008 a game came out called Army Of Two. The game was only centered around co-op and it was insanely fun even though it was not a great game. There was a sequel to that game and for some reason Electronic Arts wants to make the series popular.
Well the game's fun but it is pretty much the same as the last Army of Two game as IGN explained and it has messy level design as Now Gamer said. All the hype that this game is getting for no apparent reason is for no apparent reason. Army of Two is an example of hard marketing. Wanting for something to sell.
Overall only get this game if you want to.
Army Of Two:The Devil's Cartel is rated M.

Critics Consensus: The Place Beyond The Pines

Hi! We are Critics Consensus. We post the regular critics opinion for video games and movies! Today it is a new movie from the director of Blue Valentine.
From the director of Blue Valentine comes a movie about a dad's decision to save his son by committing a crime. Well heck ya. That sounds way better than HEY IM DA ROCK JOHNSON WE GOTTA SHOOT SOME NINJAS YA. Which is pretty much the other thing that is in theaters.
New York Observer praised it's originality,The Playlist praised it's brilliant script, but the only problem is the end. However the acting is amazing (thank you Ryan Gosling and Bradley Cooper) and the cinematography is amazing too.
Overall you have to see this movie.
The Place Beyond The Pines is rated R.

Critics Consensus: G.I. Joe:Retaliation

Hi! We are Critics Consensus. We post the regular critics opinion for video games and movies! Today it is a new G.I. Joe movie.
Before I talk about how bad this movie is, I just want to point something out. This movie mostly is not marketed to G.I Joe fans, it's marketed towards five year old kids who want to see explosions because they have a G.I Joe action figure. If you think I'm lying guess what? NPR and the Toronto Globe And Mail totally agreed with me so in your face.
Slant Magazine praised the sound editing, but just like Bullet To The Head that's the only good thing about this movie. You know when you have Channing Tatum,Dwayne Johnson, and Bruce Willis in the same movie, well nothing's gonna be spectacular but the sound editing. The performances are crap,the effects and script are generic and there's just too many guns like Movie Nation said. I mean literally when you are carrying guns out of your asshole it's a little bit stupid.
Overall do not see this movie.
G.I. Joe: Retaliation is rated PG-13.

Thursday, March 28, 2013

Critics Consensus:Terraria

Hi! We are Critics Consensus. We post the regular critics opinion for video games and movies! Today it is the port of Terraria!
Well 505 Games bought the Terraria license. They did just what 4J did to it. Make a port for Xbox 360. However could this be better than Minecraft:Xbox 360 Edition. The only thing different? Playstation 3 support with a new boss and features. Minecraft: Xbox 360 Edition came with half of the PC's features more or less. 
Eurogamer Italy praised the controls something that Minecraft Xbox 360 Edition didn't have.It's addicting as Nowgamer praised and the only problems are that it's hard (not a problem if you want a challenge) and the graphics are not great. But it's Terraria. What do you expect?

Tuesday, March 26, 2013

Critics Consensus: Bioshock Infinite

Hi! We are Critics Consensus. We post the regular critics opinion for video games and movies! Today it is the big one the one and only,

This March has sucked. Tomb Raider was good, God Of War: Acension was same old,same new, and Gears Of War:Judgement was a disappointment. I can hear the sound of gamers praying that Bioshock Infinite will meet their expectations.
Bioshock Infinite does not meet your expectations. Instead it will pick your expectations up and throw a fire grenade into it and then cut it into pieces with a machete. Bioshock Infinite has become one of the highest rated games of all time. So you do not need to bring out your Game Of The Year's IGN,Spike,Kotaku and more. You can just say it in front of our face. Nothing, absolutely nothing, can beat Bioshock Infinite. In order to compete with it's absurdly fun gameplay (as praised by Revision3 Games) it's amazing ending (as said by Sourcefed's Buy Or Die) and it's attention to detail and racial and sexist terms at that time. Bioshock Infinite has won 20 10\10's. Now that is something special.
Overall you have to get this game. Now if you bought The Walking Dead:Survival Instinct instead well you are gonna meet my fist.
Bioshock Infinite is rated M.



Saturday, March 23, 2013

Critics Consensus: The Walking Dead:Survival Instinct

Hi! We are Critics Consensus. We post the regular critics opinion for video games and movies! Today it is a new cashgrab. This explains why I hate Activision more than EA.
Back in January a leaked trailer for the Walking Dead Survival Instinct popped up. It made it look like crap. No proper aiming system, worst AI ever, and horrible graphics. We all thought that this would be the worst game of the year. Then Alien:Colonial Marines comes out and we're like: nothing can be worse than that. WE WERE WRONG.
The reason Aliens:Colonial Marines was not sent into the depths of the Underworld was that it had multiplayer. Not the best multiplayer but every little bit helps. The Walking Dead:Survival Instinct has no multiplayer and horrible graphics. Kotaku complained about that crusty compass in the left of your screen and how the game is broken in every way. Also Game Informer complained about the plot and repetitive gameplay.
Overall if you have this game use the disc as a frisbee.
The Walking Dead:Survival Instinct is rated M.

Friday, March 22, 2013

Critics Consensus: Olympus Has Fallen

Hi! We are Critics Consensus. We post the regular critics opinion for video games and movies! Today it is a new generic action movie. Yay.....
Olympus Has Fallen has been getting a lot of flack because White House Down has been coming out in the same period with the same plot. So Olympus Has Fallen has been doing whatever they can to stand out. Well looks like Olympus Has Fallen Has Fallen.
Olympus Has Fallen is way to over the top with about 10000000 bullets in the first hour as ReviewsOnTheRun complained. The acting is crap as Movie Nation said but it's fun if you are not expecting anything.
Overall only see this movie if you want to.
Olympus Has Fallen is rated R.


Critics Consensus:The Croods

Hi! We are Critics Consensus. We post the regular critics opinion for video games and movies! Today it is a new animated movie!



The Croods is aspiring to be a family friendly fun movie about the world's first modern family. Paramount and Dreamworks are trying to step it up after Madagascar 3 and Ice Age 4 proved well at the box office. The question that begs is will this film succeed?
The Croods barely catches the arrow. Film.com praised that it was heart-warming and that it exceeded their low expectations. However the animation is not very good as The New York Times said. At least some kids will appreciate the voice acting which is sub-par.
Overall see this movie if you have kids.
The Croods is rated PG.



Critics Consensus:Admission

Hi! We are Critics Consensus. We post the regular critics opinion for video games and movies! Today it is a new comedy starring Tina Fey.

Tina Fey has been one of the most prominent features in the comedy worlds today and after 2010's disappointing Date Night is trying to have a theatrical hit. Admissions plot has never been done before which makes it strictly original but the question begs, can it be a hit?
Admission is about a college admissions grader looking for happiness. It also stars Paul Rudd from 2012's This Is 40. The main critics consensus for Admission is that the performances and chemistry between Paul Rudd and Tina Fey is great but the movie is not well directed or not funny as Chicago Reader said.
Overall only see this movie if you want to.
Admission is rated PG-13.

Thursday, March 21, 2013

Critics Consensus: Luigi's Mansion:Dark Moon

Hi! We are Critics Consensus. We post the regular critics opinion for video games and movies! Today it is the sequel to the 2001 hit Luigi's Mansion!

Nintendo said that 2013 would be the year of Luigi. Well looks like it's off to a great start. Nintendo has recently been rehashing old franchises and I can not wait until Mario Hockey rolls in so we can end it but maybe we don't because Luigi's Mansion has a 86 on Metacritic.
Luigi's Mansion is unlike any other Mario game and is exquisitely unique as Telegraph said. Destructoid also praised the addictive multiplayer and said that it was better than the singleplayer. To put it in other words, it's like a new Nintendo Land.
Overall you have to get this game. Fire Emblem and this are the reason to get a 3DS.
Luigi's Mansion 2 is rated E.

Tuesday, March 19, 2013

Critics Consensus: Gears Of War:Judgement

Hi! We are Critics Consensus. We post the regular critics opinion for video games and movies! Today it is a new Gears Of War game.


Just like Halo 4 a franchise is being milked again. But instead of staying with that now unhealthy cow they will go to a new cow. People Can Fly. The question is it better than Halo 4 or worse than Halo 4. Or is it the same. That could happen too.
First of all let's go to the graphics. Machinima called them beautiful and ReviewsOnTheRun said that the enemies looked the best of any game in the franchise.
For story, nothing is spectacular. The new character Sofia is cool but Baird can be really unlikable. However the end is interesting as it points to the first Gears.
The gameplay is great as Strategy Informer said  the campaign is only 6-7 hours and the last few levels are very linear and tedious. As IGN Italy said the multiplayer was fun and enthralling but could have used more modes.
Overall get this game if you want to. It's not amazing but it's not a disappointment.
Gears Of War Judgement is rated M.

Saturday, March 16, 2013

Critics Consensus:Starcraft II:Heart Of The Swarm

Hi! We are Critics Consensus. We post the regular critics opinion for video games and movies! Today it is a StarCraft II expansion pack.
So let's say you are a avid PC gamer if you are not one already. The servers on SimCity are down and you just finished TombRaider. Well if you have Starcraft 2 I have some good news for you. There's a new expansion pack that's getting really good reviews.
 For the multiplayer Vandal Online said that it  was enthralling,Edge Magazine called the single player massively enjoyable and 3DJuegos said that the campaign was solid. So ya. Here you go. Are you happy yet? 
Overall get this game.
Starcraft 2:Heart Of The Swarm is rated T.


Critics Consensus:Spring Breakers

Hi! We are Critics Consensus. We post the regular critics opinion for video games and movies! Today it is Spring Breakers a movie which it's two major selling points are Skrillex and cleavage.  Well this movie is going to go good at the box office.

Well this movie is getting good reviews. That's surprising to me. Like I know Harmony Korine is a great director and all that but I expected this film to get bad reviews. If you see the trailer you know what I mean. But it's getting good reviews. Imma gonna clap my hands forever because two perverted titles that have come out this week are getting good reviews. CLAP CLAP CLAP.
At least one critic agreed with me by saying that this film was just Girls Gone Wild.  Thank you New York Post. But then again two critics gave it a 10\10 for it being hilariously funny. It's also Saints Row 3 over the top. OK this is changing my opinion a little bit.
Overall see this movie if you want to.
Spring Breakers is rated R.

Critics Consensus: The Incredible Burt Wonderstone

Hi! We are Critics Consensus. We post the regular critics opinion for video games and movies! Today it is the Talladega Nights of a magician. If you know what I mean.

Steve Carell,Steve Buschemi,Jim Carrey and Alan Arkin. They're magicians. So how can this movie possibly fail? I hate this quote because it does not mean jack. A script means everything actors, meh.... Just look at Rotten Tomatoes  I am significantly disappointed.
Time Magazine said it was semi-bad and sometimes it was funny but usually the script fails in every direction because it's not funny enough, predictable and gripping. Like how I have not even seen the movie and I already know the ending. It's like a Megamind script.
Overall only see this movie if you want to. A-List Actors do not mean its a good movie and plus all the laughs are in the trailer.
The Incredible Burt Wonderstone is rated PG-13.

Thursday, March 14, 2013

Critics Consensus: Darkstalkers Ressurrection

Hi! We are Critics Consensus. We post the regular critics opinion for video games and movies! Today it is a game based off the Darkstalkers anime!

Despite the interesting boxart for this game, (I expect that if a box art for a game is all the characters getting shoved into what looks like the antagonists breast, It's probably gonna be a bad game.) But who knows the game is getting good reviews and I don't even what Darkstalkers is and maybe that's what the series is about. Pretty f*cked up series if you ask me.
Anyway the game has been getting good reviews as Skullgirls so that's a good sign. If it's just as good as Skullgirls as Metro Game Central said. That means it would be original,fun and innovative. However it's also the same as Skullgirls with that boxart.
Overall get this game if your'e a fan I guess? I need to cover something over than God Of War so...
Darkstalkers: Resurrection is rated T.



Tuesday, March 12, 2013

Critics Consensus: God Of War:Ascension

Hi! We are Critics Consensus. We post the regular critics opinion for video games and movies! Today it is a new God Of War game!
So uh Kratos is back in the seventh God Of War game and he's the angriest person on Earth. Sony probably had to introduce some new technology so that this anger can actually exist in entertainment. The only reason this is an important release is the first time God Of War has had multiplayer. Ooh's and Ahh's are here now.
So let's jump right into it. The multiplayer has been said by SmoshGames that it is fun and innovative but the scoring system is poor and you do not win for getting a lot of kills. 
The story is good but it's more of the same regular God Of War as SourceFed's Steven Zaragoza explained.  Multiplayer.it said it was less epic than the other games which is something God Of War is known for. But it is fun when guts and gore fly onto the screen.
The plot is regular and not anything special and the sound is not good with some sounds missing from the actual game. The graphics are good with beautiful vistas but the game forces you to look at them so if you do not care, sorry.
Overall get this game if you want to.
God Of War:Ascension is rated M.

Friday, March 8, 2013

Critics Consensus:Dead Man Down

Hi! We are Critics Consensus. We post the regular critics opinion for video games and movies! Today it is a new crime drama. 
You know you have no hope for movies in 2013 when there is only four good movies that have come out. You have very little hope. Very little hope. So when a movie comes and its crap you are not surprised. At all. Here we have Dead Man Down a new crime drama thriller yay.....
This movie is not bad or so bad its funny. It's just a regular crap movie. Ok throw it in the pile. It's out of place, takes forever to get going, and is boring AV Club and Schmoes Know said that by the way and they are pretty intelligent.
Overall just you don't need to think about this movie. It's a time waster.
Dead Man Down is rated R.

Critics Consensus: Oz The Great And Powerful

Hi! We are Critics Consensus. We post the regular critics opinion for video games and movies! Today it is Oz The Great And Powerful a reboot of the Wizard Of Oz!
Sam Rami the director of the Spider Man franchise and Evil Dead,James Franco, and Mila Kunis. How can this movie possibly fail? Well that's when you read the script for this movie. They are literally throwing money at the screen with all the CGI in this movie. Love that quote.
Randy Myers from San Jose Mercury News complained that the film was OK but was not as magical as the place it was trying to portray which if it got that right the film would probably have a Rotten Tomatoes score higher than a 60%. Also ReviewsOnTheRun complained that James Franco's performance could be way better. Come on James do a 127 Hours on us.
Overall only see this movie if you really want to.
Oz The Great And Powerful is rated PG.


Thursday, March 7, 2013

Critics Consensus: SimCity

Hi! We are Critics Consensus. We post the regular critics opinion for video games and movies! Today it is the reboot of SimCity!
The last SimCity game was SimCity Social but technically that does not count as a SimCity game so the last SimCity game was 2009's poorly received  Sim City Creator. That was nearly four years ago and now Electronic Arts is trying to reboot a dying franchise. But a major brick wall stands in the way.
Server Issues.
SimCity's average userscore on Metacritic is a 1.7 out of 10. Never mind critics have given SimCity 9's and 10's and saying that it is the most fun they have had with a simulation game in years. It's just that more than 50% of people are not going to be able to play it because of server issues. SimCity is a fantastic juggernaut. Just buy it in a month when all the servers are OK.
Overall only get this game if you want to. Please wait.
SimCity is rated E10+.

Tuesday, March 5, 2013

Critics Consensus:MLB 13: The Show

Hi! We are Critics Consensus. We post the regular critics opinion for video games and movies! Today it is a new MLB The Show game!
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Last year you had a decision between MLB2K and MLB:The Show and then 2K killed the franchise due to poor sales. Like not you had much of a decision because MLB The Show is the best one always. Why well and 85 on Metacritic explains a lot.
Hardcore Gamer Magazine praised SCEA's numerous improvements to the game and not taking things out but instead making it better. I'm talking about you Madden. IGN said that this was the best MLB:The Show. You probably have no money from each amazing game coming out but I think you can make a loan....
Overall get this game.
MLB 13:The Show is rated E.

Critics Consensus:Tomb Raider

Hi! We are Critics Consensus. We post the regular critics opinion for video games and movies! Today it is Tomb Raider the reboot of the amazing franchise Tomb Raider.
If there's one thing about Crystal Dynamics is that they never quit. When their company was first created they made a racing game called Crash N Burn. This game sold horribly but what companies like Ninja Theory have shown us is that you have to start somewhere. 
ImpulseGamer gave it a 10\10 saying that it had next-generation graphics and gameplay,Digital Spy said that the characters were amazing and the character development was great,and the Smosh Games show Dope Or Nope praised the voice acting. In fact Im gonna go into more detail. Tomb Raider is amazing right from the start. The deaths will make you feel like you did something wrong and make you feel for Lara like you have never have before. In fact Tomb Raider has gotten so much critical acclaim that it will probably be nominated for a Game Of The Year award. That's right. Game Of The Year.
Overall you have to get this game. If you walk over to the store and they are closed run to the other store that sells this enthralling adventure. You will not regret it.
Tomb Raider is rated M.

Friday, March 1, 2013

Critics Consensus: The Last Exorcism Part II

Hi! We are Critics Consensus. We post the regular critics opinion for video games and movies! Today it is the sequel to The Last Exorcism.
The Last Exorcism was one of the last good horror movies before Paranormal Activity killed everything into shaky cam. It was original and gripping. Nothing was better than it. Well some Hollywood Executives are in their pool drinking their martini's saying "goddamn we are so smart." 
The acting is okay and that's all The Last Exorcism Part II has going for it. Slant Magazine complained about the horrible dialogue and Movie Nation said that the movie was worse than The Devil Inside. Really? It's that bad? Ok we'll I think we need a SWAT Team to get all these viewers of the movie out now.
Overall do not see this movie. I COMMAND YOU!
The Last Exorcism Part II is rated R.


Critics Consensus:Stoker

Hi! We are Critics Consensus. We post the regular critics opinion for video games and movies! Today it is a new horror movie with Nicole Kidman.
I have good news and bad news for you. Stoker is a great movie. Well not exactly great compared to Argo but I'm hoping for another 2012 where all the good movies come out in the end. The bad news is that this is the only good movie that comes out this week. That was a bit stupid to think Jack The Giant Slayer and 21 And Over would be good movies but whatever.
Stoker does not have the best writing as explained by The Boston Globe but the acting is amazing and the film's scares are worth the whole experience. Hey Empire gave the film a 100\100 and they are pretty hard critics to impress. Maybe a 69% does not mean too much.
Overall see this movie.
Stoker is rated R.



Critics Consensus: Jack The Giant Slayer

Hi! We are Critics Consensus. We post the regular critics opinion for video games and movies! Today it is Jack The Giant Slayer.
Remember a few years ago where everybody was like "Hollywood truly is running out of ideas?" Well I don't remember it being as bad as this. Just like Hansel and Gretel: Witch Hunters this had a troubled development and it was pretty obvious it was only made by Hollywood to make money. Well they achieved their goal cause I know that some idiot will see this movie.
The New York Post had one of the more positive reviews and explained how the movie was like a junior Lord Of The Rings, but NPR and Film.com complained about the film's CGI and how the film was so forgettable. This film is crying the word "HEY IM CRAP, BUT A LOT OF MONEY WENT INTO ME SO PLEASE SEE ME, PLEASE?
Overall only see this movie if you really want to.
Jack The Giant Slayer is rated PG-13.

Critics Consensus:21 And Over

Hi! We are Critics Consensus. We post the regular critics opinion for video games and movies! Today it is 21 And Over a new comedy.

21 And Over is an example of false movie advertising. "From The Writers Of The Hangover" the poster bellows. This movie was probably created before The Hangover was such a big hit. So basically this is Jon Lucas and Scott Moore's worst work being created only to make money.
And when movies do that critics like USA Today complain about the film's inappropriate and immature scenes. Ted was funny. Not this. You know your movie is a piece of rubbish where one of the scenes is someone eating a tampon. I can hear a bunch of laughs from stupid college kids.
Overall 21 And Over is a piece of crap. Don't this or 21. Oh a new trend.
21 And Over is rated R.